Relationship advice to amplify your impact.

Recently I was binge watching youtube, and ended up on Tony Robbins channel for several hours. Lets face it, the guy knows how to do what he does like no other. And I noticed as I went from one seminar video to another that there was 1 thing he kept going to when discussing relationships and human behavior in general. It was so crucial to the work he was doing with people that I realized it is the heart of so much for understanding human behavior.
This got me thinking about my own behavior, and about how it might be relative to business and how things have changed with our consumer. The tool I am referring to is what he called the 6 basic needs.

    These 6 needs are (in the order I learned of them) –

  • Certainty
  • Uncertainty
  • Significance
  • Connection / Love
  • Growth
  • Contribution

All humans regardless of social stature, race, gender etc…
Have these same needs in different levels of importance to us at different stages of our lives.
But there are 2 of them that are most urgent based on how we have wired ourselves.
For myself, I know that the most important 1 is significance.
This need is what drives me to do the work I do and to do it with so much impact.

Lets take a look at each of these briefly to better understand what our audience needs from us.

There are areas that we need to be certain that they are handled in order to perform as our optimal selves.Shelter, food, basic needs being met. Having a good understanding of what to expect based on past experiences.

This is where the Universe shows its twisted sense of humor. Because next to certainty, we also all need a certain level of Uncertainty. Risk, adventure, a sense of danger. These things help us to “feel alive” and help us stay out of burnout or boredom. With out any level of uncertainty, Depression often sets in.

Significance / Achievement – We have a self awareness as humans. We think therefore we are. As a result we have a strong need to make a difference with our life. It might only be to a single person, or you might want to have an impact on the entire world. Making an impact, sharing your message and really making a difference are all desires of being significant. Achievement, no matter how trivial or small it may seem at the time, needs to be recognized not only by others, but more importantly we need to take a moment to recognize our achievements in order to establish a feeling of significance.

Connection / Love – We all need to be able to feel that we are loved by someone. Preferably someone who we also love. Intimate connections, sometimes in a sexual nature are one of the strongest ways that we develop a feeling of love. Being present with others, and truly opening ourselves up to them and their love is something that many of us find to be easier said than done.

When we stop growing, we die.
That might seem a bit dramatic at first. And it can be every bit as dramatic as it sounds.
But the reality can be much more tragic than that even. See when we stop growing, we start dying but not always in a physical way. Not at first. Usually if we stop growing we quickly die on the inside. we die emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. We can continue to exist for years in this state. Unhappy, angry and miserable, just existing day by day without any reason to live. People in this state often turn to addiction to make it to the next day. Just going through the motions and making those closest to them miserable in the process.

Always do something that helps you grow in some way and in some area of your life. Yes it can frustrate you to come up against a challenge that is difficult, but the battle also helps us feel alive.

It turns out that your need to be a part of something bigger does not make you crazy. In fact, we all feel that need in some way. Helping others, in a big way or even just with a smile. If we don’t feel like we are contributing to others in some way, then we start to feel useless. We mistake a lack of contribution as a lack of worth. Not everyone is going to feel compelled to volunteer of course and that is how it should be. But being a part of a team, working with others towards a common goal. This is what the human need of contribution is all about.

So those are a brief overview of the 6 human needs. Here is the real kicker.
We all have these needs, but we also all have different ways we need to have them met.
That means, what fulfills your sense of growth for instance may leave someone else feeling dead and empty inside.
But, when we get these needs met in a way that we need them met. We are drawn like a powerful magnet to the source of that fulfillment. The draw is so strong that even when we know something is intrinsically bad for us, we will continue to pursue it. Addiction to anything from sugar, alcohol, gambling, nicotine, etc…
is created by having these needs artificially filled.

The more of these that something ( whatever it may be) meets for us, the stronger a bond we form with them.
Ask yourself, what ones of these 6 does your product, business, or brand help people satisfy within themselves?

Is there a way that you can craft your marketing to reinforce satisfying those needs in your audience?
What can you do to touch more of them or touch on them in a stronger way?

This is relationship advice, what does it have to do with my business and building my tribe?

By learning how to recognize the different ways you can help people satisfy their needs with or through your products and services. You can express this through your message and start impacting others in a more profound way. Your audience will not only be drawn to you, forming a tribe of loving and loyal customers, but you will also be able to have a real and lasting impact on them and their lives. You will be able to make a real difference in the world. And believe it or not, you will be able to meet your own needs in the list above as a result.

About the Author

Jeff Halligan - Online Marketing consultant and tactician with 20+ years helping companies like yours. Amazon Best selling author, recognized by Ilab for the Global impact award, wrote the guidebook on social media marketing best practices 2017 being used by international social marketing firms.